I’m not happy with being called “old,”
“elderly” is just dumb,
and “senior citizen” was only invented
to be politically correct,
it’s obnoxious partronizing,
meaningless and superficial,
just an insult coated with sugar.

What does that leave me with?
“Geezer” (what the hell is that?)
or the always popular “old fart,”
or maybe “codger,”
as in “just an old codger.”

Then there is “coot,”
defined in the dictionary,
as a rather ugly duck
also known as a mud hen.
Or as a strange, old man.
How nice.

Or maybe “golden-ager”
It means nothing,
But it’s better than
“decrepit,”
“senile,”
“doddering,” (as in doddering old fool),
or “tottery” (look it up).

If you regard me as an object,
and some of you do, maybe,
“antiquated,”
“archaic,”
or “ancient” could be used.

But I’d forget it
if you don’t want to be hit with a cane.
And don’t even think of using
references to my physical attributes.
I’m not a wobbly old man,
a shaking old man,
or a trembling old man.
I’m just a “man.”

So instead of any of these,
can I recommend,
as my hair recedes and turns to gray,
you call me what I have been called all my life,
call me by my name—Dave.

 

pickup-yellow-3 in Just a Geezer in Seniors Boomers activities and life

What to Call Me?
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